Avoiding Regret when Projects Stumble

Running a project, which, by definition, creates a new product, process, or service, involves taking risks. Sometimes it doesn’t work out. You step outside your comfort zone to pursue a big benefit, but it doesn’t pan out the way you hoped. When that happens, it’s easy to spiral into regret and second-guessing. But there are better ways to process disappointment and move forward. Here’s how:

• Use regret as a decision-making tool, not a set of handcuffs. Before you make a big decision, ask yourself: “Will I regret NOT trying this?” Research shows that people overwhelmingly regret the things they didn’t do rather than the things they did. If the fear of regretting inaction is pushing you forward, that’s a good sign. You’re more likely to regret playing it safe than taking a chance that doesn’t work out.
• Look for different ways to address a project requirement. Just because one approach didn’t work doesn’t mean you have to abandon what you’re passionate about. Sometimes the thing we want can come about in unexpected ways if we stay open to possibilities. Rest, take a break, let your mind wander. You just might come up with an approach that’s even better than your original idea.
• Focus on what you learned, not just what you lost. Every experience teaches you something, even the painful ones. What did you discover about your project management? What skills did you develop? What would you do differently next time? When you frame it as “failing forward” rather than just failing, you can extract value from even disappointing outcomes.
• Be selective about whose criticism you take to heart. When evaluating feedback or criticism, ask yourself two questions: Has this person done what I’m trying to do? Is this person managing the type of projects I’m tackling? If the answer to both is no, their opinion probably isn’t worth losing sleep over. Take constructive feedback from people who’ve walked the path you’re on, and let the rest roll off you.

Remember that persistence sometimes pays off in unexpected ways. Before you completely shut down a project, consider whether there are things you haven’t tried yet. Sometimes the breakthrough comes in month 20, not month 18. That said, there’s also wisdom in knowing when to pivot. The key is making that decision consciously, based on what you’ve learned, rather than giving up because you’re tired or scared.